{♥} Why?! {♥},
Thursday, December 25, 2008 @ 6:09 PM
Why???!!!
Wait a sec! Let me write bout yesterdays Confession in church
before i go all gloomy and emo....
Yesterday.....
there was a reconciliation service in Church at 8pm.
I was in church like say 7, reason being, my parents are
warden's so they need to be there early for briefing
and stuff..
Ya so i hanged around the crying baby room for a while,
soon got board so though to walk around, so i went to the
coffee corner, there i saw Francesca, Marilyn and Satamp..
Talked to them for a while then passed them the
invitation for moi xmas gathering...
Tt's when Clarisson walked in, i din say HI , i din even act like
i CARED!!! How could i ?! WAIT A SEC !!!
I writing bout recon service not bout clarisson....Will come to tt
later..
mmmm......
Then i went to auditorium to assemble and reflect before going
for confession..
I was reflecting when i got a glimpse of Jean.
She came and sat beside me, we talked..
Then we decided to go for confession, but....
Too many ppl so we went to seat again, at the back this time.
We talked , till it was our turn.
Priscilla and Jeremiah were behind us in the
Q, we were chatting and Jean was laughing away
for a odd reason, seeing her laugh made us laugh too..
The nex thing i noe we are laughing for no reason..
K, we were done wif laughing.
we were directed by the wardens to the priest tt we
were suppose to go and confess.
I was thinking hard to confess all my sins...
Hope i did....
after confession i went to do my penance..
I prayed , askin forgiveness from Lord for my sins
and for making a mistake in my past relationship..
Well tt was all for confession...
NOW ....time for the "HOW?!" question..
I was giving invitations for Marilyn, Francesca and satamp right..
Clarisson("brother") walked in right??
I ignored him right??
Tt was totally abnormal and stupid of me right???
NOW comes the WOW.
i can't believe i ignored my "brother"
Why do i ever get the wrong feelings for my "brother"?!
Naturally seeing him cause my tears to run which is
hard to control.
Clarisson has a nice smile, caring heart..
Humps......
I've got to correct my mistakes and get back to reality..
Illusions are juz for emo days but not for everyday..
I've made mistakes bout me bout my friends bout Clarisson...
I've got to change...
NOW why i hate RELATIONSHIPS!!!!
Relationships dun mean a thing...
LOVE kills and soothes...
But it killed me ....
He stalked a knife through my heart now it's bleeding..
Will it ever stop???
Will my tears end??
Will my scar heal???
Will my broken heart ever get fixed????
Soo many questions still unanswered...
Now i juz pray for my answers...
I'm sorry.....